
By Judi Light Hopson.
Perhaps you're juggling five major projects at your present job while still dealing with your routine duties. But on top of this, a family crisis has surfaced. How will you cope?
If an illness, death or other major concern is pushing you to the limit, you need to try to stay calm and lay out an action plan with workable stages. Here are some tips to help:
Don't Tell the Boss Too Much -- Yet
Why? You don't want to overload him too soon. If your crisis worsens,
you may need to solicit cooperation from your boss.
If you verbalize too many details now, it will make it hard for your boss to listen later. Share the bare facts only; this will help the boss stay open to offering you flextime or resources if things go from bad to worse.
Alert Certain Clients
Only contact those who need to know. Email them, saying, "I have
a family emergency. I can't get the information you requested until early
next week." Or, phone important customers to say, "I have a
family crisis going on. I will be in my office from 9 a.m. until noon
only this week."
Ask for Communication Support
Ask trusted people close to your family crisis to alert you if things
get worse. For example, if a family member is in the hospital, ask
a specific nurse on each shift to call you if anything changes. At
work, arrange for a trusted coworker to forward work emails to your
home.
Call in Favors
Ask lots of people for a little help. If your crisis is really stressful,
it's better to risk straining a few people than overload yourself to
the max. You could ask your next-door neighbor to pick up your son
from school. For at least a few days, ask someone to drive needed papers
to your home or office.
" I had to become a humble man," says one business owner. "I had to ask many favors of my secretary, her husband, my brother and my neighbor when my wife fell down a flight of stairs."
" Our three kids are under age 10," he continues. "By
the fourth day after the accident, my life was coming apart. I'd advise
anyone to ask for help early on. Don't wait too long."
Try to Work in Focused Time Slots
When a crisis first arises, you may have to leave work for three straight
days -- or three straight weeks. But when things calm down, you'll probably
want to deal with pressing work matters. Focused time slots can help.
" When a tornado hit the corner of my house, one of my children was injured badly," says one factory supervisor. "I worked from 9 a.m. to 10:30 a.m., left to be with my child and returned in the afternoons for an hour and a half and then left again. This went on for two straight weeks. By focusing well, I managed my job just fine."
Find Out If Your Company Offers Any Resources
Ask someone in HR if your company can provide time off, dependent-care
assistance, etc. "My company helped me arrange housing for out-of-town
relatives when my wife died," says one supervisor. "They
also paid for child-care assistance for two weeks. My boss arranged
vacation time for me and appointed a company assistant to bring work
to my house for more than two months."
Manage the Crisis and Your Family
To manage your crisis, you will need to gain information, find support
and stay focused. As soon as you can reasonably stabilize the crisis
situation, create a plan for your family to cope. Stay calm and do
give up perfection. Meals, schedules, and school activities should
be simplified as much as possible. Don't feel badly about cutting corners.
Order fast food a lot or wear the same clothes twice. For now, do what
works.
The crisis, your home life, and work pressures all need to be managed
as individually as possible. Ask your friends and coworkers for advice,
too. Don't give up until you find acceptable answers.